Africa

Africa

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

The Proposal


*Pictures are at the very end*


The background:

As most of you know from talking to me, Clay and I never discussed when we would get engaged. Like when I say I had no idea I really had no idea. We obviously talked about the future and knew we wanted to get married based on our love for each other and seeing each other’s love for the Lord, and reading off my non-negotiables after knowing him for maybe a month…ya know, super casual. But he never let me get caught up in the details of an engagement and proposal because 1-he is completely grounded in his faith and knows that rings and poems and flowers mean nothing compared to eternity in heaven with Jesus, and 2-he wanted it to be a complete surprise. No ring shopping, no hints at what I liked, no sending my friends pictures of rings to send to him. Nothing. (P.S. The ring is GORGEOUS and so me! He did good!) He had always planned on asking my dad for his blessing before proposing. But he did not tell my parents, or his parents, his best friend, or anyone when the event would actually occur.
One of Clay’s good friends, Stephen Young, used this same approach when proposing to his now wife, Julie Inman. Julie told me how awesome it was to be totally shocked and that she wishes every girl would allow it to play out that way. After being in her shoes, I could not agree more.
Ladies, let your man surprise you. I repeat, do not discuss A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G. leading up to the proposal. Obvi, you need to talk about if you're right for each other. I mean don't talk about the fru fru details. It is so so so exciting and special and wonderful when you just let it happen when it happens!

The proposal:

We had been in Fayetteville over the weekend for the Razorback game and for my brother's 21st birthday. Sunday we met Michael for lunch to celebrate his big day. We finished eating around 1:30pm and headed out of town on our way to Hawksbill Crag, near Ponca. I have had my eyes set on hiking Hawksbill for quite some time. Despite the awful weather both Saturday and Monday, Sunday was PERFECT. It was sunny but very cool, and the leaves were changing colors. It honestly couldn’t have been better! We started hiking and made it to the main ledge; we took several pictures and just soaked in the beauty around us. We I really wanted to get a good picture of us so we decided to keep walking and find a place by ourselves since the big ledge had about 10 other people at the time. While I was being ADD and looking everywhere around me, Clay put his backpack down and got out his go pro. I walked up to him asking for some Kleenexes and as he reached into his backpack he turned the go pro on, pulled out the ring, whipped around on one knee and asked me if I would marry him, in like 3 seconds flat. My next words were, “This is not real. OMG. Seriously? YES. Yes. Omg. Wait, have you talked to my dad first? Okay good. Oh my gosh. This is not real. Is this real? Wow. I love you so much.” And yes these are my exact words because he filmed me and we've replayed it over and over. I am SOOO thankful he has it on film for us to relive the rest of our lives. Bringing the go pro was the best idea ever because it allowed us to get videos, pictures, and be completely alone during this moment. He proceeded to tell me that he never knew how much he could love someone until he realized his love for me, and some other sweet things but I was still awkward from being so shocked that I just listened and couldn’t speak. 

We started to talk about what we wanted for our relationship during our engagement. We don’t want to let the wedding take over our time together. During school we see each other about 2-3 times a week if I don’t have an exam, but the weeks I do have an exam we might go over a week without seeing one another. And our houses are only 6 miles apart! We joked earlier in the weekend how we have to travel to Fayetteville to hang out. So our time is limited and we don’t want to let the wedding planning take over the few moments we do have. The divorce rate in America is 50%. We have chosen to plan for our marriage more than our wedding. And let me tell you, after only a few days of being engaged, Clay is going to be extremely good at this. The verdict is still out if I will be successful with this. All prayers appreciated. :)  I’ve never met someone more grounded in truth when it comes to knowing what’s important and what is not. I am extremely lucky to have him as my leader.

After we talked, we prayed together for the first time as an engaged couple which was THE BEST THING EVER. Y’all prayer is my love language. I’m obsessed with it and cannot wait for the intimacy I will experience with Clay as we grow in this area. Gosh it’s fantastic to connect on that level.

We finished taking pictures, wiped away the tears, and headed back to the car. As we were driving back on the highway, we made the call to stop thru Russellville and tell my parents in person. Soon after that, a 100 pound doe decided to sprint in front of my car. Clay tried to swerve and ended up only hitting the back of the deer which messed up the front of my car. Now we actually had a legitimate reason to stop. I called my parents and told them what happened and they met us at my grandparent’s house. We moved all our bags from my car to my grandma’s, which I’m borrowing for the time being. Then after we were all talking we announced we were engaged! They could not believe it! Everyone was so shocked and excited because Clay never led anyone to believe it would happen anytime soon. Minus my dad who he had talked to beforehand. But even he was shocked by the actual timing of it! Then we hopped in the car and headed to LR.

Once in LR we had to run by Clay’s parent’s house to pick up his dog, Decoy (isn’t that the most precious name for a retired hunting dog?), whom his parents kept for the weekend, and also to pick up Clay’s truck. We walked in and they started asking me about the deer and our time in Fayetteville. After a while I told Mrs. Linda she was going to have to get me a new cup with my monogrammed initials on it because the one she got me for my birthday wouldn’t work anymore. She thought it was because it was broken, in which she replied, “Oh that’s fine mine broke too and I’m drinking out of Bailey’s so I can get us both a new one.” I said, “Actually, it’s because I’m going to need a new monogram.” She immediately asked if I had something to show her, grabbed my left hand out of my arms, squealed, and told Clay she was so mad at him for not telling her. Haha we all laughed and both she and Mr. Frank were beyond excited for us! I’ve felt like a part of Clay’s family since the very first time I met them. I honestly think I could search for the rest of my life and I would never find in-laws like them. I am marrying into the most loving, giving, and biggest family I ever could have dreamed about being a part of!

We went upstairs and got Bailey (Clay’s 16 year old sister), and then went into Bryce’s room, (Clay’s 17 year old brother) and told them the news. James and Yusuf, the Rwandan residents were already sound asleep. We talked with everyone and around 10:30pm left their house and went back to Clay’s. On the way to Clay's I called my brother and told him I hated to overshadow his 21st birthday but he was now getting a brother-in-law so I hoped he would forgive us. I’ve never heard my brother so excited before. I really felt his support and love even on his own special day. Clay called Taylor, his older brother (I told you his family was big) and Taylor’s wife Emily, and told them the news.
We got to Clay’s house and uploaded the go pro videos onto the computer. We called a few more friends who were still awake and I finally made it to my house and in bed by 1:30am. Those 12 hours were the most exciting, crazy, AMAZING hours that I got to spend with Clay. Like I said earlier, our time together is so so precious and I am beyond thankful I had a small break from studying to make new memories with him.

It was a blast telling everyone versus me being the last to find out. It was almost like I was proposing to everyone because of the initial shock they all felt!

The aftermath:

Since the moment we announced our engagement Monday, we have felt an immense amount of  love from every single one of you. I have been brought to tears by the people who have asked my mom if they can host a shower, my friends who have easily been just as excited as I am, and everyone else who has cared for me as if I were their own daughter, and Clay their own son. I am thankful for my community in Russellville and the friends I have in Fayetteville, LR and everywhere in between. We have laughed and cried and have been filled with unending joy these past few days.

The hashtag we chose is #TeamRamey. Obviously, we LOVE sports so anything with that theme seems fitting. There were a few times while dating when his mom said something small I agreed with over how Clay felt, and he would proceed to tell me that his mom was LSU and he was Arkansas and I was playing for the wrong team. We always laughed about it. We know that we are a team now, walking hand in hand to the middle of the field. A team of husband and wife. And a team of believers focused on bringing God glory in every aspect of our lives.

We ask that you pray for our marriage. Please pray that we will not idolize each other, but instead always worship the Lord and push each other towards the cross. We ask that you pray for eyes that see the good in each other when we are anything but that, for hearts to be stripped of the desires of our flesh, and for us to wear forgiveness and love on our heart each day. I also personally ask that you pray for me to prioritize my time planning while in school and continue to stay focused on becoming the best pharmacist and wife I can be. We love you guys and look forward to celebrating this season that is completely new and surreal to us!

  Hawksbill Crag. 10.12.14.










Love,
The Future RAMEYS!